Category Archives: Life

Explorations of human experience, daily living, personal growth, and existence.

Cover of the book Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill

#67 Burning desire, clear plans, and persistence: lessons for the New Year

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I always wanted to subscribe to Blinkist, but I found it too expensive. Unexpectedly, Blinkist came my way, as my partner accidentally bought a yearly subscription and I decided to split it with her. One thing that’s amazing about Blinkist—and that I didn’t know—is that you can have a joint subscription.

I dove into it and I’ve already read/listened to multiple Blinks, which, for those who are not familiar with the app, are summaries of great books you can consume either by listening or reading.

Among these, I found one filled with amazing reminders: Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill.

Since it’s the end of the year, and I think this book could help anybody who wants to have a successful and great next year, I wanted to share my main takeaways in an even more concise way, with a personal perspective where applicable.

1. Burning desire

A burning desire—for me, it’s completing my novel. Even though I will still reflect on it during my Year Compass reflections, which I will do this week, I already feel this desire clearly guiding me.

👉 If you want to know more about the Year Compass, you can read my post on this topic here:
#18 A compass for the year ahead that works

2. Detailed goal and plan

Goal and detailed plan: read them out loud twice a day.

As I was reading this, I realized I want to follow this approach to finish my book—having a detailed plan of my weekly goals, but also a clearly laid-out book structure. This instead of relying on spontaneous moments of inspiration, which, despite being fun and amazing, come with the downside of being sporadic.

With the blog, this is much easier. Its format—periodic posts related to topics I’m interested in, reflections, and personal insights—already provides a solid framework. The openness of a blog and its frequency are a really good structure to achieve this.

3. Unwavering faith

Have unwavering faith in yourself. It can help us move mountains.

I think, for example, of my desire to leave Italy and explore the outside world. I held this dream for almost the 17 years I lived there—and I eventually achieved it. I think about my university achievements despite the obstacles and gaps I had. I think about finding a job again after more than a year of unemployment.

👉 I wrote more about this difficult period and what it taught me here:
#33 Do we remember with honesty? | #28 Le sfide del processo d’integrazione tra ammirazione e invidia

4. Autosuggestions

Autosuggestions— influencing yourself with specific, purposeful thoughts. Persuading yourself.

This is a kind of self-hypnosis, but as long as it’s done consciously, without losing your compass of what’s realistically achievable with your current knowledge and experience, this is definitely a powerful tool.

5. Knowledge is power

Repeating Mr. Bacon’s evergreen Scientia potentia est, translated from Latin as “knowledge is power.”

But stacking facts on top of each other is not what this really means. Knowledge is experience—and yes, knowledge itself—not a mere accumulation of concepts. It’s the willingness to continue learning throughout our lives.

We also need to know where we can find knowledge, and for that, it’s always better to be surrounded by people who know more than we do.

6. Dreams into ideas, ideas into reality

In a nutshell, we need to be able to imagine with no boundaries, then shape those ideas into something concrete and within our reach—and then go for it in the world we live in.

7. Know your own strengths and weaknesses

Being self-aware in an honest, conscious way allows us to take action against our weaknesses.

To do that, Hill suggests asking ourselves the following three questions:

  • Have I achieved my aim for this year?
  • Was I a good communicator?
  • Did I make all the right decisions along the way?

Then, ask what could have been improved. Finally, evaluate this with somebody who knows us well and is honest enough to point out our weaknesses. We also need to be open to hearing it.

8. Positive emotions

Here, I feel I have a lot of room for improvement.

In recent years, overconsumption of news and listening to my own—and others’—overcritical voices has made me quite pessimistic about many aspects of life. Without mentioning the component of negative thinking that comes from my own family.

👉 This theme also runs deeply through my novel-in-progress:
#60 “Il giovane che voleva andarsene”, un romanzo – Parte I, 1

Positive emotions are key to a successful life and must be nurtured. Feed the positivity within you. Avoid negative people and information. Don’t waste your life on pessimistic headlines. Fill it with love and enthusiasm.

9. Determination is key

Make decisions and stand behind them, no matter what. Stick to what you believe in. Don’t let negative, unsubstantiated influences and criticism get to you.

At the same time, stay open to constructive feedback. Smart people know how to point you in the right direction while empowering you. Surround yourself with that kind of people.

10. Only the persistent will succeed

Persistence and endurance are key. Remember these lessons:

  • Identify your burning desire
  • Have a concrete goal
  • Have a very specific plan
  • Don’t let negative, unsubstantiated opinions affect your resolve
  • Have a trustworthy and knowledgeable network of people around you—people who are better than you and can provide support and assistance

11. The bigger the goal, the more people you will need

This closing thought really resonated with me.

The bigger the goal, the more of the right people you’ll need to support you and your dream—a selected group of like-minded souls. If these people put all their knowledge and burning desire together, the sky is the limit.

Use this in your Year Compass, and I’m sure you’ll achieve great things next year.

Bottom line

Big goals don’t live in isolation. They need clarity, belief, emotional balance, and the right people around them. What Think and Grow Rich reminded me—through Blinkist and through my own reflections—is that success is less about sudden breakthroughs and more about steady alignment between desire, action, and persistence. If you take even one of these ideas into the new year, you’re already moving forward.

#26 Il peso di gennaio: timori, speranze e resilienza

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Sono alla fine dell’ultimo lunedì di gennaio e mi sento stanco, non per la giornata lavorativa appena conclusa, ma per la quantità di eventi che si sono susseguiti in queste poche settimane del nuovo anno. Eventi che vanno da quelli che riempiono il cuore di speranza, come la liberazione di Cecilia Sala dalla prigione in Iran, a quelli che lasciano sospesi tra sollievo e diffidenza, come il cessate il fuoco a Gaza, fino a quelli che fanno venire i brividi, come il braccio teso di Elon Musk a ringraziare la folla per la fiducia riposta in loro, MAGA boys.

A più riprese mi sono detto: “Certe notizie sono veramente delle supercazzole,” oppure, ispirate ad una scena del film Idiocracy, in cui la società è talmente decadente che persino il senso comune più basico sembra perdere ogni significato.

A febbraio ci attendono le elezioni qui in Germania; a maggio, quelle in Romania. Rabbrividisco pensando alla piega ancora più Orwelliana che potrebbe delinearsi di fronte a noi.

In questi momenti, vengo assorbito da una spirale di pensieri e riflessioni nel tentativo di decifrare l’indecifrabile destino dell’umanità. Cerco di ritrovare quei concetti che ormai sembrano dissolversi in particelle sempre più minuscole e inafferrabili: pace, democrazia, tolleranza. Eppure, è in questi momenti che mi dico: ci siamo già passati e ce l’abbiamo fatta. L’umanità ha vissuto orrori indescrivibili. Impareremo dai nostri errori ed evolveremo.

Mi soffermo sulla semplice constatazione della nostra capacità, come esseri umani, di commettere errori che vanno al di là di ogni concezione. Eppure, riusciamo a imparare da essi, anche quando il nostro destino sembra irreversibilmente compromesso da azioni che non hanno nulla di umano.

E allora, prendo un lungo sospiro. Non è un sospiro di sollievo, perché il sollievo oggi è difficile trovarlo. È semplicemente un sospiro che, tuttavia, mi permette di riconnettermi con il mio corpo e tornare a percepire ciò che mi sta intorno, un po’ più presente.

Mi sforzo poi di pensare alla cosa più bella che mi sia capitata oggi, questa settimana e questo mese, e tre immagini mi vengono in mente: il volto della donna che amo, le piante di cui mi prendo cura e il mio corpo che ancora funziona.

#25 Coerenza interiore e cambiamenti personali tra verità e onestà

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Onestà: La qualità interiore di chi si comporta con lealtà, rettitudine e sincerità, in base a principi morali ritenuti universalmente validi.

Verità: Carattere di ciò che è vero, conformità o coerenza a principi dati o a una realtà obiettiva.

Vocabolario Treccani

Queste definizioni, prese dal vocabolario e lette al volo nel contesto in cui viviamo oggi, mi fanno pensare a una vecchia cornice impolverata appesa al muro di una casa abbandonata chissà dove. Devo dire che molte altre parole che incarnano ideali morali hanno su di me lo stesso effetto malinconico, se considerate in relazione alla realtà che ci circonda. Eppure, continuo a cercarle dentro di me, a perdermi in un mondo che oscilla tra il complesso e il superficiale, spesso confondendomi.

L’onestà, come valore, l’ho sempre distinta dalla verità come concetto, almeno inconsciamente – o almeno credo. Tuttavia, quando mi trovo coinvolto in dinamiche complesse, sia sentimentali che professionali, a volte utilizzo questi due termini in modo intercambiabile, confondendo i loro significati. Ma questa confusione, tutto sommato, la considero positiva perché mi spinge a riflettere più attentamente su entrambi. Non mi interessa tanto esplorare il loro significato o l’etimologia – non avrei le competenze necessarie, non essendo né linguista, né antropologo, né ricercatore. Piuttosto, mi interrogo su ciò che rappresentano per me.

Istintivamente direi che verità e onestà hanno per me un valore quasi assoluto, guidandomi in ogni decisione, azione o interazione quotidiana. Ma affermarlo sarebbe una bugia. Essere onesto, dire la verità e comportarmi in modo autentico è un’impresa che spesso mi sovrasta. Per me, infatti, l’onestà non si limita a dire la verità a qualcuno, ma implica agire in linea con i miei valori, come suggerisce la definizione riportata all’inizio di questo articolo. Se riesco ad agire in linea con i miei principi morali, allora la questione superficiale del “dire la verità” nemmeno si pone, perché ogni azione sarebbe allineata con il mio autentico io, con l’immagine che ho di me stesso.

Ed è qui che mi trovo in un’impasse: l’immagine che ho di me potrebbe non corrispondere alla verità. Eppure, quella stessa immagine, nel tempo, potrebbe guidarmi verso la verità. Ma anche se, in un dato momento, essa fosse effettivamente in linea con il mio autentico io e con i principi morali che ho scelto come base della mia identità, questo stato non sarebbe altro che temporaneo. Io mi percepisco in continua evoluzione, in costante cambiamento, accompagnando un mondo che viaggia a una velocità incredibile – o forse sono io quello lento… chi lo sa. Che il mondo sia veloce o io lento, alla fine non importa.

Io non credo – nel senso di credere devotamente o indiscutibilmente a qualcosa. Questo mio continuo evolvermi ha consolidato un approccio critico e curioso, che mette in discussione tutto.

La morte, ad esempio, non mi spaventa. Invecchiare non mi infastidisce. Perdere i capelli non mi rende paranoico. La solitudine, cambiare amicizie, ricominciare in una nuova città, traslocare in un altro paese, lasciare tutto per un nuovo inizio: sono cose che ho fatto ripetutamente nella mia vita, a volte per circostanze esterne, altre per decisioni personali.

Nonostante questi cambiamenti continui, i miei principi morali guida sono rimasti più o meno gli stessi. A volte mi hanno guidato con maggiore forza, altre con meno. Ed è strano: mentre scrivo, mi viene in mente un altro concetto, quello di fede. Solo nominarlo sembra contraddire tutto ciò che ho detto prima sul fatto che io non credo.

Ma benché le mie riflessioni su questo e mi molti altri temi mi portino spesso contraddizioni o riflessioni inconcludenti, trovo conforto nella complessità e nell’evoluzione costante del mio rapporto con la verità e l’onestà.

#24 Making space for the silence within

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There are moments when my mind shuts down—when no matter how much effort I put into deciding what to do next, my brain simply refuses to respond or act. It doesn’t matter if it’s about preparing the next meal or planning the next big step in my life. My body won’t move. It feels like a meteorological phenomenon inside my soul—a heavy, warm wind pressing down. Sometimes it lasts a few hours; sometimes, it lingers for a couple of days.

I used to resist these moments, seeking shelter in unhealthy ways by blaming myself and feeling resentful. I would desperately try to fill the emptiness with random, unplanned actions that lacked intention or purpose. After all, isn’t that what we’re taught by the outside world? “Brush it off.” “Just do something.”
Often, this overwhelming wind would push me into a deep hole, where solitude and loneliness threatened to consume me.

This weekend, the strong, warm wind came again. However, for some months now, I’ve stopped resisting it. I let it shake me. I let it push me into the hole. And in that quiet, I found myself. I sat in silence, under an imaginary tree, and hugged myself. I whispered, “Don’t worry. No rush. It’s all good. This will pass.” And it did.

I decided to keep caring for myself in my own way—not in the way the world expects me to. My thoughts were scattered, and there was some anxiety, but I allowed it to exist.

I went for a walk. Luckily, the sun was shining—a rare sight in Berlin’s winter skies. Then I went to the sauna, reconnecting with my body and soul. When I returned home, the wind within me had softened into a gentle, pleasant breeze.

#23 A cross-cultural journey leading to authenticity

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I recently had a conversation with a German friend that brought up an interesting topic highlighting cultural differences and perspectives.
We started talking about ethics in customer service and sales, then expanded the conversation to the importance of being authentic and honest. From his point of view and upbringing, being one’s true self and saying what one thinks is essential and non-negotiable. Today, I agree with him 100% on this viewpoint, but back then, I was caught up in the mechanisms of the main cultures I was exposed to as a child and adolescent. I probably wouldn’t have even been able to acknowledge its importance.

We were drinking tea, and he picked up a mug to make a point:
“In Germany, I would sell this (the mug) to you by saying, ‘You can drink from it.’ Maybe I would additionally mention the quality of the material, but that’s it.”

Yes, I thought, that aligns with my experience with Germans—a very essential, functional, and honest approach. That’s one of the main reasons I like living here: I don’t lose sleep trying to interpret the hidden meanings of something someone told me the day before. They say what they think and think what they say, most of the time.

“In Italy and Brazil, that wouldn’t work,” I replied. “Marketing is a powerful component in selling any product, and you need to deliver a story that touches the heart to catch someone’s attention.”

That’s not exactly what I said; I’m paraphrasing a little. We were speaking in German, so I probably said something even more basic, but that’s what I was trying to communicate. However, as I wrote this paraphrased version, I noticed the issue again in the words “to catch someone’s attention.”

From my experience, in Latin America and Mediterranean countries, emotions and feelings are deeply embedded in communication. Some might perceive this as dramatic, while others might call it passionate. The challenge, however, is that one can easily get carried away by emotions and stories. Trying to convince an audience—or simply “to catch their attention”—by leveraging emotions is a tricky endeavor. It can often blur into manipulation, where pleasing others, telling white lies, or navigating situations through embellished stories (whether true or not) becomes a common practice.

This approach often shifts the focus toward meeting the expectations of others rather than adhering to the values that are meaningful to oneself. As a result, it sometimes feels like everyone is playing a role rather than being their authentic selves. And yet, I recognize that these are cultural traits of the societies and communities I’ve been exposed to. Of course, there are ways to develop ethical practices within these cultural frameworks, but I’d argue that it’s challenging to stay authentic—or, to put it less abstractly, to remain connected to one’s core and true self.

The greater danger is that, in constantly trying to meet others’ expectations, we risk losing touch with our own needs. Personally, I feel I’ve grown closer to understanding my own needs in the five years I’ve lived in Germany than in the thirty-three years I lived elsewhere. Perhaps this is simply part of my natural maturation process, unrelated to the cultural environment—one can never be entirely certain. Still, I believe living here has significantly influenced this journey.

I say all this without resentment or regret about my past or roots—or at least, I hope that’s true.

To close, I hope I haven’t hurt anyone’s feelings with this anecdotal and spontaneous reflection. I realize cultural differences are a slippery slope and are often prone to stereotyping. If I’ve fallen into that trap, I apologize in advance.

#22 My forgotten Happy Thoughts

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Toodles: [Searching for something on the floor] Lost, lost, lost.
Peter Banning: Lost what?
Toodles: I’ve lost my marbles.

With this short dialogue, we were introduced to Toodles in Hook, the amazing Peter Pan movie from the ’90s starring Robin Williams. The way I understood it, the marbles mentioned in the dialogue were a metaphor for Peter Pan’s happy thoughts—something he had literally lost, growing up into an insensitive workaholic adult named Peter Banning. Later in the movie, he finds them again (both Toodles’ marbles and his own happy thoughts) after an amazing adventure in Neverland to rescue his children from the clutches of Captain Hook, who had kidnapped them.

On a separate and unrelated subject, a few days ago was the birthday of one of the most important people I’ve met in my entire life: my uncle Beto. During my childhood, Uncle Beto was like a father to me—the best one anyone could wish for.

He made me laugh and taught me amazing things, like putting glass on my kite strings to win kite battles against other very competitive kids. He allowed me to express myself: smile, laugh, make silly jokes, and ask a thousand times the same question—he would actually play along. He never dismissed me and always explained things in a way that sparked curiosity, even when I had no idea what he was talking about.

I could spend an entire day listing the reasons why he played an immense role in my life and the person I’ve become. Despite this, he never sought recognition or validation. Life eventually pulled us apart for reasons too long to explain, but hardly a day goes by without me thinking of him as one of the heroes of my childhood.

On another unrelated topic, last year (2024) marked the 30th anniversary of Ayrton Senna’s death. “Ayrton Senna from Brazil,” as the famous Brazilian commentator Galvão Bueno used to call him enthusiastically while narrating Senna’s Formula 1 performance, which kept all of Brazil glued to their TVs. Senna also influenced me greatly with the values he embodied: tenacity in the face of immense challenges, generosity and passion among many.

Now, here is where these seemingly unrelated topics come together.
The other day, after greeting my uncle for his birthday, I told him I had watched the Senna miniseries on Netflix. It reminded me of when we used to go to his parents’ house for the weekend and ended the day watching Formula 1 Grand Prix races, rooting for Senna.

He replied with a beautiful message that made me very emotional. He said he had also watched the series and that it reminded him of me. He recalled some episodes from when I was a kid—like how, while driving with me in the backseat about to fall asleep, he would say, “Look, there’s Senna out there!” and I’d wake up immediately, looking for Senna outside the window. I couldn’t remember that memory before he mentioned it, but it was so precious to me because I loved hearing my uncle’s laugh—always full of joy and childlike energy, despite his ability to make us all feel safe and protected.

Then, he reminded me of the day Senna died. It was one of the saddest days in Brazil’s recent history. As crazy as it may sound, you’d have to have been there in Brazil during those years to truly understand. My uncle told me that after learning the news, he came to check on me. We were going to his parents’ house that day, but when he found me, I already knew. We cried together in the elevator while getting ready. Now I remember that moment, though I didn’t before he brought it up. There are many moments of my childhood that I don’t remember—many happy ones.

I’m left with a question: Have I gone from Peter Pan to Peter Banning? Have I become an insensitive workaholic adult who’s lost his marbles and happy thoughts? Maybe, or maybe not. Perhaps Hook will come for me and take me back to Neverland. No! As usual, I’ll need to do the hard work of digging, understanding, and integrating to get there.  But once again, thanks to my uncle, Senna and Peter Pan, I’ve learned something important: it’s never too late to rediscover the joy and wonder we once held close.
Whether through reconnecting with loved ones, revisiting cherished memories, or embracing the values of our heroes, we have the power to reclaim our marbles and rediscover our happy thoughts.